Prabodh Kumar Enumula

In Recruiterbox, we use the word empathy quite often. I feel definition of that word is different for different people. This post is summary of my views on that.

To put in simple words, I would say you have empathy if you have an ear for others feelings and can spare a minute to understand their choices. If you are empathetic, you would usually be able to put yourself in other shoes and make an effort to understand their point of arguments. By default, we all are empathetic about our own selves. We always have a reason behind our choices and can defend our emotions/feelings.

Also we are usually empathetic over people like ourselves. Say, If i am developer, i usually understand what developer satisfaction, motivation etc when other developers say it but don’t really give a damn about people outside my own craft say sales people or customers. Usually most people happen to be here [ either by choice or unknowingly ]

One needs to move one step above this level to be a great contributor, one should have what i call as full stack empathy . Lot of us developers, aspire to be full stack developers and generalist who can pick any tool and get things done . Similarly, if you can be empathetic about business choices,  customer and customer support or just any other team you are interacting with. You can become a true leader if you start practising full stack empathy, and people will naturally look up to you to discuss their choices

One quality which can help immensely to be able to have full stack empathy is being kind to other people than trying to outsmart others in team. I will stop with this quote from Jeff Bezos commencement speech at Princeton about kindness

“One day you’ll understand that it’s harder to be kind than clever…What I want to talk to you about today is the difference between gifts and choices. Cleverness is a gift, kindness is a choice. Gifts are easy — they’re given after all. Choices can be hard. You can seduce yourself with your gifts if you’re not careful, and if you do, it’ll probably be to the detriment of your choices.”